R v. Smith

*just because I’m studying for my Law of Evidence test which is to hold tomorrow*


This is my re-imagination of the case, R v. Smith.

In secondary school, all my friends used to call me Smooth and I loved it. Although I could never let my mom hear them call me that, I indulged them as riskily as I could. My dad, if he had found out that instead of our surname Smith, I was being called Smooth, he’d laugh out loud and say, ‘What did you do to earn the name?’ My answer would have depended on whether my mom was present. If she wasn’t, I’d have said, ‘You know why dad. You’re housing he who is the smoothest, with the girls’. My dad would have erupted in another fit of laughter.

I know I have painted my dad to be the most amiable and my mom to be the strictest but I would never invite you to sleep over in my house. In the morning, in daylight, my dad was a super guy but then at night, he became a monster – either beating or forcing himself on my mom. His threats to kill her were so numerous that the day she finally died, both of us simply sat cold-faced staring at walls for days.

I grew up and told myself that I’d never do anything like my dad – not even laugh like him. But like I read somewhere, ‘You learn once you see. To unlearn you must intentionally unsee.’ I grew up trying to be the coolest guy in any gathering and that worked fine for me. I got the attention of any lady I wanted until a lady caught my own attention and I could not look away. Her name was Rita. Rita was calm, easy going and trusting and so I got married to her within 6 months of meeting her.

I was the perfect husband; careful not to do anything my dad had done. I was kind to her both morning and night and my laugh was gentle, like that of my mother. Then one day I lost my job and all the entitlements that came with it (the car, the health insurance and the house). Rita and I moved to a run-down two bedroom apartment and told each other that we still loved each other, even through the struggles.

I did not get back on my feet like I anticipated and I started hanging around the wrong crowd. I met a guy (we used to call him Savage). Savage helped me financially but destroyed my whole life in return. He so influenced me that I was having repulsive thoughts about life and methods of wealth attainment. I was not that guy… until I was that guy.

(***imagine a long and dark place in my life***)

One day I got up and told Rita I wanted to get her some life insurance. ‘Assure my life? We barely have enough to eat!’ she said confused. ‘Yes. My point exactly, we need to insure both our lives with the way things are going.’ I left words unspoken and she understood me. Or at least she thought she did.

Shortly after we both got life insurance, I killed Rita – drowned her in our bath. It was an easy task, physically but was the most challenging burden on my emotions and my mind. After grieving, I went to the insurance company and got my ‘compensation’. I did not spend the money for a month but I soon got hungry and broke and spent it all.

I needed more, so I went back into the market and got myself another wife – Mirabel. Insured her and drowned her. I got my money.

I did not intend for it to be a habit which was why I was shocked when I found myself getting married to Anne; and insuring her life; and drowning her in our bath.

But then, with Anne, I was caught. I guess you can’t really drown all your brides and get away with it.

So this is why I’m now a case study for all  law students in the world. On the more gloomy side of things, I went two steps further than  my father.


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