I once played a long and tiring game with a certain somebody
It was called ‘Connecting the Dots’
User 1: My Heart
Preparedness Level: Novice
Special Skills: Fantasizing and Special Blindness
User 2: The Certain Somebody
Preparedness Level: Oblivion a.k.a ‘What dots?’
Special Skills: Being a baby boy
So here was how it went: I’d sit square looking at him (we were dating then) and try to connect the dots in both our lives to lead me to the end point – that he was truly right for me. Now, the trick to this game was that, he was obviously and fundamentally wrong for me, my progress and my life in general (and particular). My family and friends were the little obstacles on my way popping up with words and stern stares telling me not to proceed with the game; to give up. But I had to win the game.
From novice, I graduated to an expert; finding the weirdest and most remote things about this certain somebody and connecting them to my life. I would step back, look at the screen and look at the bizarre connections but will nod my head and say, ‘at least they are connected. This game is going fine.’
But then one day, the game ended. There were no more dots to connect and I suddenly realized I was running in circles and I had created this big hideous shape (called ‘My Life’) from all those remote dots I connected; and the threads which I used to connect those dots were wearing thin and snapping by the fiber because they lacked substance to start with; and I was running out of my mind because I had spent all the good years of my life trying to create this hideous thing. But then, there was User 2… sitting off-handish somewhere remote from the disaster but close enough to access wireless connection. And it was then, as I stared at him with the sounds of threads snapping behind me, I realized that the only successful connection User 2 and I had had and ever will have is the connection with his mobile phone and my hotspot. And even that, was a parasitic connection.
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